mother’s day

Last year I wrote a hateful, whiny, anti-mother screech for mother’s day.  But this year I am older and wiser and a little bit less angry, so I am going to try again.

Mother’s Day is important even if you don’t have a mom around.  Maybe it’s even more important and here’s why.

If we are lucky in our lives, a lot of people love us, and some of us in mothering ways.  If we’re smart, we let them.  And if we’re really smart, we thank them.  Our own original moms may have had a choice whether or not to become a mother, especially in the 50 years since the pill came out, but they didn’t choose to mother us specifically unless we’re adopted.  But many of us get mothering love from people who chose us and who love us even when we’re not perfect.

So now I want to thank all of the real life and internet moms and aunts who love me even though they don’t have to.  Thanks to my brother, who was my first substitute mom, and thanks to Hazel’s mom, Agnes, Uncle Dave, Aunt Betsy, Auntie Sue, Mrs. B, Bob, all of the Beach House moms & aunts, and Grandma K.  One day I will be a great mom because of all of you.


I like the message of peace.


New mom and puppies

Mother’s Day Proclamation – 1870

by Julia Ward Howe Arise then…women of this day!
Arise, all women who have hearts!
Whether your baptism be of water or of tears!
Say firmly:
“We will not have questions answered by irrelevant agencies,
Our husbands will not come to us, reeking with carnage,
For caresses and applause.
Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn
All that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience.
We, the women of one country,
Will be too tender of those of another country
To allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs.”

From the voice of a devastated Earth a voice goes up with
Our own. It says: “Disarm! Disarm!
The sword of murder is not the balance of justice.”
Blood does not wipe our dishonor,
Nor violence indicate possession.
As men have often forsaken the plough and the anvil
At the summons of war,
Let women now leave all that may be left of home
For a great and earnest day of counsel.
Let them meet first, as women, to bewail and commemorate the dead.
Let them solemnly take counsel with each other as to the means
Whereby the great human family can live in peace…
Each bearing after his own time the sacred impress, not of Caesar,
But of God –
In the name of womanhood and humanity, I earnestly ask
That a general congress of women without limit of nationality,
May be appointed and held at someplace deemed most convenient
And the earliest period consistent with its objects,
To promote the alliance of the different nationalities,
The amicable settlement of international questions,
The great and general interests of peace.
• More about the history of Julia Ward Howe and Mother’s Day